Let's talk vampires...
If you have an older tween or a teen daughter in your home, chances are you've heard the word "Twilight" come up in conversation. Or maybe not, but be assured it's probably on your daughter's radar. Twilight the movie, is based on the best-selling book series by the same name and will release in theaters on November 21st, so I thought it might be a good idea to talk about it. The series was written by author, Stephanie Meyers, a Mormon wife and mom. The fourth and final book in the series, Breaking Dawn, sold 1.3 million copies on the day it was released (Saturday, August 2), so obviously this is a quite a force to reckoned with and clearly, a huge hit with its target audience.
During the Q&A forum at the You & Your Girl event in Kentucky this past weekend, questions related to the book and movie outnumbered all other questions I received. I have not read the series and therefore, I do not feel qualified to express an opinion. I have heard both pros and cons regarding the series and have talked to some moms (including my sister-in-law) who are reading the book series at the same time as their daughters in an effort to understand and discuss what is being read. I really like that idea, but again, this assumes that the reader is old enough to break down the message and filter it through God's lens in an effort to discern Truth from fiction.
About a month ago, I asked one of my staff to read the books and she recently posted about Twilight on the virtuousreality.com blog (our site for teen girls). You might pop over there and see what girls themselves are saying about Twilight. I was very impressed with many of the girls' honest and vulnerable answers. You might also enjoy this review by Focus on the Family's site pluggedinonline.com.
In the meantime, if your daughter is in the target audience for Twilight (both the books and the movie), weigh in and share your thoughts and/or experience. If you comment, please share your daughter's age if it's relevant to your answer.
35 comments:
Thank you for bring this book series to my attention. While at the movies this past weekend (seeing HSM3 with my preteen) she noticed the ad for this vampire movie. I must admit I didn't know anything about the series or the movie but my guard was instantly up 'vampires?'. I am not thinking so. This was so helpful to be able to learn about it more. I will now know without a doubt how to respond to my daughter and will actually initiate a conversation about it to her this evening. Thank you and continued blessings on such an important ministry. I know you bless me.
I read the books before I let my 11-year-old daughter read them. I thought they were very romantic and basically clean, but the near absence of God in the characters' lives bothered me (they do discuss whether God exists and if vampires have lost their souls, but Jesus is not mentioned). The last book takes a very nasty twist and ruined the story for me; I will not let my daughter read that one.
Over a year ago, I read Twilight in order to determine if it was appropriate for my then 13 yo daughter. I actually liked it and she didn't! So I read the remaining books. I spent quite a bit of time pondering the material, and here's what I determined:
1. While Edward worries about the state of his soul, if indeed anything vampiric existed it would be demonic. The world of Twilight is purely fantasy and should be looked at in that context. A reader should be careful not to think of vampires as "good guys in real life". They do not exist in real life, and if they did, they would not be good guys.
2. Bella is clearly obsessed with Edward. She, nor he, have healthy boundaries. However, if you look at most classic literary love stories, you won't find many with decent boundaries...perhaps Pride and Prejudice. Think of Romeo and Juliet, for example. So I looked at this as a love story, but not an example for my daughter.
3. A clear danger, and in my mind perhaps the greatest danger, is obsession with the Twilight world. You know your child and whether she is prone to obsession. Mine is, so I am glad that she did not fall into the as so many others have. She was obsessed with Lord of the Rings, which is generally accepted reading in Christian circles. Balance is key, and living in reality and not a fantasy.
4. Perhaps because the author is Mormon, there are some spiritual LDS overtones to the book. I believe the same is present in her adult work, The Host. I'm not saying that matters, but I did find it interesting to notice.
5. Stephenie Meyer is a very good writer, who is also a mom. I appreciate the fact that her couple was intentionally abstinent before marriage. Yes, Bella would have done things differently. It's great to see a couple where the guy is drawing the line. Of course, it's not great to see just one more example of a teenage girl willing to initiate sex with her boyfriend (3rd book).
I want to see the movie, but my daughter doesn't. Go figure! I do expect the movie to be much scarier than the book...when you add music it ratchets up the suspense. The book itself I did not find scary or dark.
I think your age range is too large. My 17 year old has read the series as well as myself. I would NEVER allow my 8 or 10 year old to read it. I agree with Kay totally. It is a very clean book but not Godly. I believe at one point they referenced their unbelief in God. This was a fiction book that brought great discussion with my oldest daughter and I about purity and it being a "story", not real!
My girl is 10. She hasn't mentioned the series...but she doesn't like "scary" stuff. I was at her school book fair this morning, and was stunned by how many books there are about vampires and the supernatural...targeted to elementary school kids. We'll stick with Beverly Cleary and the American Girl books...thank you very much!
I am embarrassed to say that my daughter read 3 of the books without my consent and after finding out, we discussed her thoughts, I was quite discouraged with what she came away with. At 15 yrs old, she didn't see the fallacy in the main girls character to relentlessly persue a guy that will mean death to her. She was captivated by the romance. After reading the Plugged In article my daughter agreed to not go see the movie because it helped open her eyes to the ungodliness of this series. I have found that many Moms are not aware of this series and have not stepped in to ask questions. They seem OK with the fact that this is a PG13 movie and their girls are 15 so it must be OK. Thanks for helping raise awareness.
Darla
I have just read all books - staying just chapters ahead of my 6th grader. This was after months of her begging to read them and then 2 months of school where her GT English teacher recommended them and had copies in her classroom. I went into them with my guard up and my desire way down - but was instantly drawn into the storyline. Very intriguing and wonderfully well-written, I must admit. My daughter and I discussed them while reading them and have discussed them frequently since. Reminding her that these are so far fetched and fantastical that nothing like this could ever happen was a regular theme of mine. One thing I did like was Edward's old-fashioned views about romance and intercourse - very refreshing. And, as another of your bloggers said, except for the occasional question about souls and existence of God, there was nothing about Christianity in any book. My daughter and I did talk about that and really went a little deeper and "out there" than we would have without having read the books. (I just don't think we would have had a conversation about a vampire-infested Northwestern community that didn't know Jesus on our own.) I think she appreciated that I would take the time to explore the books myself and reach out to her instead of just arbitrarily saying "no", which I had been saying for awhile. Now we have a cool little mom/daughter book club thing going on. Can't wait to see what we pick next.
I am trying to make it through the first book and I find it boring. I don't get the appeal. My 6 year old has more imagination than this book and a higher reading ability. The book is written very simplistic and is less then challenging in complexity. That being said, so far the book seems harmless. Harry Potter is more curious than these books.
I haven't read these, but as an adult who read avidly as a teenager (and still does today) I wanted to put in my two cents on this.
As Christians, we all have strengths and weaknesses- I never had an interest in the supernatural or vampires or any of that kind of stuff. So books like these would just be a few hours of reading enjoyment... but my Christian SIL admits it would have been dangerous for her to read these because this stuff has always held an allure for her.
I think the most important thing would be to use this as an opening to talk to each other about why certain things tempt us and how we individually discern if God is warning us away from something. I don't read books about child predators- I have a two year old daughter and those books open me up to having a heart of fear and anxiety.
I have friends who do not read books that contain adultery because they know this is something they struggle in their thoughts with.
And for parents- I am not a parent of a teen so I don't want to tell you what to do since I have never been there. I would encourage you to remember this as you make your decision- just because something is an area or discomfort or temptation for you, that doesn't mean that it is for your child.
Thank you so much for posting on this book. Our daughter has several friends that have read it and 'recommended" it to her, but thankfully she asked me about it first. I was able to look at the links, read the reviews, and draw a conclusion. I'll have my daughter read these and we'll discuss what we've read, and then talk about why she will or will not be able to read them. My kids have seen me many times start a book and then put it down or turn it back into the library because it contained material that was not appropriate (language or situation) and we've encouraged our kids to follow suite. Thank you so much for taking time to address this current issue in literature!
I've never posted before, but felt compelled to do so on this subject. My 6th grade daughter, 11 years old, thankfully asked me if she could read this book, because many of her friends had read it and loved the series. She even mentioned that her friends were "obsessed" with Edward. I had never heard of the series. I borrowed the first book to read myself and preview before I would allow my daughter to read it. Moms know their daughters best. After reading the book, I told my daughter "no," but we had a good conversation of why, and she was okay with it. First, this book was too mature for my own daughter to read. To start with, it is about vampires and high schoolers, and there will be plenty of time for my 11-year-old daughter to read such content. The end of the book contains a physically violent scene, and it would be too much for my daughter. Although there is no sex in the book (see other references to "clean"), I believe it is very sensual, and would arouse curiosity in a young girl who has yet to have these feelings. I do NOT admire Edward's unwillingness to have sex with Bella, because it is based purely on his fear of the physical harm he would do to her (including kill her) vs. caring about or protecting her virginity or waiting until marriage. I also didn't like the message Bella gives -- that it's acceptable to willingly throw away everything she is or has had, to take the risk of permanently becoming part of Edward's vampire lifestyle. Again, it goes back to obsession and healthy balance. And speaking of obsession, I borrowed the book from my daughter's near 12-year-old friend. Scratched into the cover of the book were the words "I love Edward." I'm not saying I won't ever let my daughter read it. I may when she's a couple years older, but we will have good discussion about it. For MY daughter, 11 years old is way too young. Thank you.
Funny you brought this up this week because Monday night, my 10 year old saw the preview and went, oh yeah, I can't wait to read those books, to which her dad & I both at the same time said no way. She then told me her teacher was reading it and would pass it around when he got done. He said it was not bad. First, someone elses "not bad" may not necessarily be mine. Second, she is 10!! And third, it is about vampires for goodness sake. I told her to go get her bible and read Phil 4:8 to me. She did and just kind of looked at me with the so what does that mean look. I then explained that the theme of the book did not fit into the good, lovely praiseworthy, true things that we were supposed to think on. I don't know if she ever got ok with it, but I explained how we are to guard our minds and fill them with good things.
I am so glad to hear from so many Moms that have read this book! I was only vaguely aware of it. I have an 11 y/0 and after reading these reviews I know she is not ready for this. Possibly when she is older and has a better grasp of herself.
Thanks Ladies!
Christine (Mom to Zoe (5) & Ana
(11)
I think it is more dangerous to insist that everything be "clean" but be void of thought provoking situations that could lead to thoughts of God, even if it’s some time down the road. We are called to be intelligent, thinking people. We are not called to be spiritual wimps or void of knowledge of what's going on in the world. We should be a people that can handle a little racy reading material while still pursuing God. I think being an effective Christian and having influence on those outside the church goes hand and hand with not freaking out over every little thing that we consider ungodly. We can be in the presence of "ungodly" or "worldly" and still be pursuing God with our minds. That's how I want to raise my daughter. I don't want to raise her to be scared of what reading a book could do to her. Go ahead, girl! Read that book! Let's talk about it and see what we've learned about people, about us, and about how God is relevant in ALL situations.
I would rather my daughter read and watch material that leads to important thoughts, even if they are challenging, than to live a lifetime of Miley Cirus and HSM which leaves God out all together.
Kristen
I voted "no" on the poll. My daughter is 11 1/2 years old and appears to have no interest in the series as of yet.
I had not heard of these books until I found a friend of mine reading "Twilight" to preview it for her daughter, a classmate of my daughter. All of a sudden, wham! I began to see the books and movie all over the place beginning that very day!
Plugged In magazine had a very thorough and helpful review/article about the series, and I recommend that as background info regardless of your feelings and situation.
If my daughter were older (mid-late teens) I might have fewer reservations, but I feel this is yet another case of material intended for an older audience being marketed to girls too young for it and moms naively allowing their tweens to be "hurried" (if they're even aware what's going on at all!) It kills me when someone, daughter or mom, says, "Well, it's okay because they don't have sex until book 3."! Hello! First of all, Plugged In's review says that even the first book contains scenes that are incredibly erotic. What is a 12 year old girl supposed to do with the feelings, emotional and physical, that such writing stirs?! That "line in the sand" mentality drives me nuts and is dangerous. These are the same parents who will believe and teach that purity means "as long as you don't have sexual intercourse, everything's ok."
So while I might consider/debate/co-read the series with an older daughter, right now it's a no go for my 6th grader.
P.S. We met you in Orlando, Vicki - we were first in line at your meet-n-greet. If you'll be my Facebook friend, you can see my photos. LOL
eleanor, of course i'll be your facebook friend!
My girls are too young for these books. They are 4th and 1st graders. However, my niece was with me over the summer and she and I were at the bookstore at midnight to get the latest book. She begged me to read the first one. I did and while it was not my cup of tea, I can totally see why these young teenagers love it. It's all teenage romance and the such. Know your kid and make an informed decision is my advice.
Oh, my niece will be back here for Thanksgiving and I'm SURE we'll be seeing the movie:)
I think the main thing to remember here is that these are young adult books. I would not consider an 11-year-old a young adult. I do not have daughters, only sons, but I would probably think this series to be appropriate no younger than 15, maybe even a little older.
These are fantasy books and they should be treated as so. Stressing that to young girls is important. Having said that, I think that teen girls can use a fantasy world to escape to from time to time and this is a good one. I've read reviews saying that these books are bad because they portray her getting married at 18 and having a baby. I think it's much better than her giving into temptation, possibly having a baby, and not get married no matter what her age.
Someone commented that Edward only put off physical intimacy because of his fear of hurting her. In the third book he makes it very clear that his biggest issue is his own virtue. He has the values of the early twentieth century. Overall, I think it's a beautiful love story.
As for adults reading the books, I think it's refreshing to find a series that I can thouroughly enjoy and not be ashamed to admit that I've read them. I did find it interesting that someone said there were LDS themes in the book. I am LDS, and I just don't see it.
Ultimately I think the best decision is the one that so many of you are making...read the books yourself before you let your daughter read them.
I have not read these books, nor has my 13 year old (I can barely get her to read as it is), but I can imagine she would want to read them simply because everyone else is, were she a "reader". It's what tweens/teens do. We just need to be aware of what they are or are not doing so we can steer them the right way. I personally have read all the HP books, and thoroughly enjoyed them, but I know the difference between reality and fantasy. I can remember when my daughter saw the first HP movie...she would go around saying "wengardien leviosa" - or whatever that spell was to make something levitate. I realized quickly that I needed to ensure that she knew that HP was fantasy and in no way real. She does understand that. But I must wonder if books and movies like these aren't de-sensitizing our younger generation (as if they aren't already enough)...its quite disturbing in my opinion. Vampires or Wizards...its all the same...occult...with a pretty bow of adventure and romance tied around it...
I just had a friend email me asking if I have heard of these series yet alone read them. I couldn't offer any advice or input but so glad to tap into information about them through here. Thanks.
Now, as your new marketing rep, I am thrilled to have discovered your free downloads on posters, broshures, etc for your
You and Your Girl event! Woohoo!!!! I will have materials in hand for my first group meeting with these ladies. :) Did I say woohoo??? It will be awesome to let these ladies know you will be just 45 minutes from our community in March at a church in Katy,TX. Its amazing if you browse long enough you can find free stuff. Looove It!
Kara, you are for sure the new mktg. rep because get this: I didn't even know about the free downloads for the event! I went and checked LifeWay's site and there they were! You rock!!
See you in Katy and you better come introduce yourself because I think we should meet face to face since you're my rep and all!
Something the plugged in review highlighted really jumps out at me and makes me relate these books with my own 'vampire' experience.
Plugged in said "it's a nice thought but she must have abandoned it somewhere along the line, because everything changes in the last book" referring to the author's claim that she resisted pressure to put graphic sex into the books. I've noticed that these kind of questionable books and movies often do that. They start out pretty tame, in essence getting you hooked into the story and the characters and then over time they abandon the restraint and make a mission of pushing the envelope as much as they can. By then you 'care' about the characters and want to continue reading (or watching).
I saw this happen in the TV series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer". I loved Buffy when it started, the show was funny and suspenseful. The characters were well written and superbly played but gradually it got more and more raunchy. By the time the series ended good-girl Willow was a lesbian witch who tried to destroy the world, Buffy had an intense sexual relationship with someone she didn't even particularly like and Xander had almost married a demon. It made light of things that shouldn't have been made light of, like demons and evil, and never gave due credit to the One who overcomes all evil.
I know I sound like a broken record but these types of books are truly a slippery slope. If someone's 14 year old daughter started book one this week, chances are she'd be in book four by New Year's. Well....there's a lot of difference (apparantly) between book one and book four and while the first book might (and I use the term might cautiously) be appropriate for a 14 year old it is doubtful that the fourth book would be.
Certainly no expert on this subject matter but I have found it interesting to note from vampire movies, etc. that holding a cross up to the vampire is the only thing that will kill the vampire. Hmmm, the power of The cross. To me, that speaks volumes as to the evils/occult meanings behind vampires, etc.
I am very thankful my teenage (15)daughter does not want to read these book as she is very opposed to the message it is sending to girls.
what a thrill tonight when i clicked on the sidebox promoting your 2009 "you and your girl" conferences and saw MY SISTER and MY NEICE as the mother and daughter featured on all your promotional materials...
i called her and told her to check out the page also. she had a long day and it made her day to see that photo!
My 10 year old son came home with Twilight at the suggestion of his Christian teacher. Nothing against the man because I adore him, but I read a few chapters of this book and there is nothing about it appropriate for a 10 year old! I sent it back to school with kind note of explanation. I was proud of my son for understanding.
I'm on the fence about this one for older kids in the same way I was about Harry Potter. My issue with this one has to do with the sexual undertones that are implied even if they aren't spoken. Goodness knows we don't need to feed that in our teens.
I'd like to weigh in on the discussion, though I am not a mom. I am 20, newly married, and have read all four books. I found them entertaining but not very well-written, and there were several things in the books that really did disturb me. I agree that it's important to read all sorts of things that are thought-provoking and raise conversation. However, I know that as a young (and totally ignorant) teen I would have probably been made curious by the lurid descriptions of sensual situations.
Also, another issue (this one doesn't have anything to do with young teens, but I think is still important): a lot of young wives and mothers I know are completely, well, "obsessed" with this series. The month my book club read Twilight, we had probably 2/3 as many people as normal - almost all of them completely obsessed. There were several women who made comments like: "I just wish my husband were like Edward", or "I made my husband read Twilight so that he could see what I wanted him to be."
My point is that, aside from the things that have been brought up in discussion already, I think that this story can really inspire some crazy ideas about what true love is. Bella and Edward present a pretty selfish, self-centered picture of love: Edward gives Bella everything and Bella never gives Edward anything. I think that this can really delude girls AND women both.
I don't think they're evil (obviously, I read all four) but I DO think that they need to be read with discernment and not obsessed over.
My daughter (13 as of 4 days ago) has been bombarded by others at school (Christian) to read these books! I had originally told her she could after her b-day. The more I read about them, the more concerned I was. Thanks to the comments here and at Virtuous Reality.com she made the decision to NOT read the books. I felt she needed to make the decision because she is in 8th grade and will be having to make more and more of these types of choices. It was a difficult one for her, but she felt convicted by the Holy Spirit not to. One of her friends was shocked because to her they were "just books". Her choice was because of the occult issues and how God does not want us dabbling in it. We went through the same thing with HP when she was little (7 or 8) by the time she was 11, I was okay with it, but she only read through #4. Anyway, thanks for your hard work Vicki!
I can't comment on the book because I don't know enough to do so.
However, I learned yesterday in a Bible study that a new trend has started. Teens have started "biting." A mother shared that her daughter was bitten by a 14 yr. old boy in the hall at school. She learned that this is a new trend from reading the books.
Just FYI
read this pastor's wife's comments on Twlight... interesting...
http://pandapalooza.blogspot.com/2008/11/wormsexit-can-please.html
I have been reading all the comments regarding these books..what I find amazing & sad is that there appears to be many Christian parents who are ok w/exposing their children to the occult, violence & sex. This is an easy choice for me and it is a definite no! A have an 11 yr old tween girl, who did not read the Harry Potter series or see the movies. She loves to read & would 24/7 if she could..She gets enough "world" stuff in the public school system, why would I want us to read books like these when there are so many excellent & wonderful Christian fiction books to read from GREAT Christian authors who cover many different topics. If the subjects in these books were put to song, would you buy the music? I am so thankful for Plugged In and Virtue Alert for helping me, a working Mom to stay on top of the culture..Ultimately, anything we read, listen to or watch is a choice we make as individuals, but we are accountable to the Lord for our choices as individuals and as parents to those He entrusted us with....
There is an article at the following website where the author states that a lot of her basic Mormon beliefs were included in the story.
http://www.sj-r.com/beliefs/x466663776/-Twilight-author-s-Mormon-faith-a-big-influence-in-books-film
I am sorry, I should have posted this with my previous post. As a former Mormon, the fact that the basic beliefs of Mormonism are woven into the story is more of a reason not to read the book than the sensual undertones (although those are also a very good reason not to pick up the book). One of the commenters here was talking about a slippery slope. This is the perfect way to describe Mormonism. And with the popularity of the books, how many of the girls reading them will be more receptive to listening to what a Mormon missionary has to say when they walk up and say something like, "Have you read Twilight, do you know the author is Mormon?" It makes me shiver thinking about it.
I've seen the movie and am nearly finished with the first book. I like it and find it safe for the older teenager range. No way would I let a younger girl read it. It's too heavy in the romance department. I think Bella has crossed over from love to obsession, but my daughter (who is 17 and is nearly done with the series) gets that and it isn't teaching her that love and obsession go hand in hand.
This book series has opened up some serious diaglogue with my daughter and I about love, morality, romance, abstinence, godlessness and faith. So for us, this has been a positive book.
I just wanted to make a correction to a post made by Paula on November 12, 2008 at 10:43 AM. Having read all four books I can tell you that yes Edward won't engage in a phsyical relationship with Bella because he is afraid of hurting her, but also because of his values. It is Bella who is always pushing for a physical relationship but Edward tells her no because he knows he will give into the temptation of going farther. There are also direct references in the book about him being "old-fashioned" in his views of marriage and sex in this new teenage world that they are living in.
As a girlsminister I just wrote some questions to help facilitate healthy conversation between moms and daughters about The Twilight books.
Check it out here: http://www.tiny.cc/twilightmomtalk
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