A horror flick in the making
It's never good news when your child wakes you up at 2 a.m. and the night before last, was certainly no exception. I vaguely remember my 19 year-old daughter, Paige, appearing at my bedside and mumbling something about a "fox being on the roof." Convinced that I was in a state of deep REM sleep, I closed my eyes in an effort to finish out this random dream about foxes roaming on rooftops. This is what I get for drinking coffee late in the afternoon.
"Dad, did you hear me? I think there is a fox lying on top of my skylight and it's creeping me and Jesi out." Paige had a friend staying over the night and the trundle bed sits directly under a skylight in Paige's room. Keith responded by rolling out of bed and mumbling something about "foxes not being able to climb up on rooftops." He grabbed a flashlight and proceeded to Paige's room to solve the fox-on-the-rooftop mystery. Her room was pitch dark and Paige's friend Jesi, was still lying motionless on the trundle bed, too frightened to move. When Keith turned on the flashlight and shined it directly onto the skylight, a chorus of high pitched screams echoed through the house. I'm pretty sure Keith screamed along with them. There he was...our 2 a.m. visitor, in all his glory. He was not a fox, but rather a plump, well-fed raccoon. And do you think he scampered off in fear? No! He just continued lying there on the skylight, sprawled out on his belly and staring down at the three frightened humans below.
I grabbed my camera and made my way to Paige's bathroom to sneak a peek through a window over her tub that offers a view of the roofline over her room. Sure enough, I had a perfect view of the critter. He had moved to the side of the skylight, no doubt to escape the annoying beam of light being flashed into his eyes. I slowly slid open the window and popped out the screen a few inches to get this picture:
As you can see, he looks anything but afraid. And he's at least 150 lbs. Oh, I kid. Probably more around a hundred. He was completely unphased as I snapped his picture and stared me down for what seemed like minutes. And then....fascinated by the flash of my camera I suppose, the critter GOT UP and began to HEAD IN MY DIRECTION! I fumbled as fast as I could to get the window closed while holding my camera and balancing precariously on the edge of the tub. Literally, within seconds of closing the latch on the window, here is what I saw:
Oh. my. goodness. Look who's screaming now. I do not like this guy. Not one bit. Right before I gathered enough composure to snap this picture, he actually reached out with his giant clawed hand and grabbed the edge of the screen! Folks, this is the kind of scene you might see in a horror flick! Forget about Friday the 13th, part 437! Do you realize how close I was to this THING touching my hand, grabbing my camera, or clawing my face to ribbons? And look at that face! That mask is real, people. Jason ain't got nothin' on this guy. And just like Jason, I have a strange feeling, this guy will be baaaaaaaack...

23 comments:
This cracked me up. It reminds me of my Father In Law telling us how his little dog freaked out in the middle of the night once. He was barking at the TV at 3am. Dad couldn't figure out why. Then he looked behind the TV and there was a racoon. It had come in the dog door. LOL
Scary and funny all at the same time.
Wow! Weird! Racoon's in this area tend to get rabies so be careful. Did you mean to say he was 150 lbs? That was funny! That would be perfect for a horror film! :)
Boy, there is never a dull moment at your house. Not even at 2am! I'd be calling somebody about him. Not sure who, but somebody needs to be called!!!
Traci
Sorry, but LOL! My dad tried to scare off raccoons with bb guns. Doesn't really work.
Looks like your raccoon found a comfortable bed. I guess he was hoping you had come to offer room service!
Now THAT is a hoot and a half!
Oh. Vicki. This made me shudder. I would be screaming with you. Be sure that window is locked tight.
No, you haven't seen the last of him. Just hope he doesn't find (or make) a way into your attic. Especially if he is a she.
And I believe you on the size. We've seen raccoons as big as large dogs in our yard.
That is freaky!
How funny! Your daughter and her friend will laugh about that forever! :) My sisters and I still laugh about the time that SNAKES somehow got into our attic and we could hear them sliding around at night. My dad (a pastor at the time) announced the dilemma and we can still remember as we were packing up our things to head over to stay with friends, the looks on the deacons faces as they headed up to the attic. Some of them had GUNS!!! :) SO funny! They found snake skins and holes in insulation and our house smelled like moth balls for MONTHS afterward! :)
Vicki - give your local Critter Control office a call and they'll set a humane trap to catch your little bandit. Good luck!
Our dog once cornered a huge raccoon on our screened in porch in the middle of the night. The dog wanted to play, but the raccoon was out for blood! It was hissing and making scary sounds. We finally dragged the dog inside and the raccoon very slowly waddled his way out of the porch and off the deck. Yikes! He was scary!
You have a hilarious story!
Wow, thats crazy!!
Oh, that gives me the shivers. I would have screamed too.
I would have been just as freaked out!
Not to worry. I think he realized you have an ant problem (see below the bathroom window), and he was coming to see what he could do to help!
Oh, my! I promise I'm laughing with you, not at you. ;)
He does NOT look a thing like Jason...if he was reaching out with his paw I am sure that he was just being friendly...this is NOT the creature from the black lagoon...he looks a lot like Zorro with the mask and he was the GOOD GUY...remember :) Now if anyone sends you Coon Gumbo recipes I am going to have to call in the animal rights groups on ya... :) Traci
Traci DeBoard
tracideboard@yahoo.com
That is really freaky and funny! Hope you have all your windows locked!
Katy
Be careful. Last time a raccoon approached our house like that, they killed him shortly afterwards a few streets over claiming that he was RABID!
I'm totally serious. CRREEEEEPPPPY.
Oh my he was huge!!! I had to fend off a racoon with a broom...smacked him twice to get him off the fence because he was hissing and leaning toward my dog, who was stupidly barking and jumping up at the racoon. My kids just laughed as I ran thru the yard with a broom in the air yelling "racooooon, racoooon"...its funny now!
Lol! A minute ago I was fuming mad about something, and now I could not stop laughing. I would totally freak out if that happened to me too. You really went out of the way to show us what you saw outside the window. Thank you!
Hi Vicki! I saw you last night at the Hungry Farmer restaurant parking lot in Granite Shoals. You must have thought I was a weirdo because I was staring at you trying to figure out where I knew you from! When I went inside the restaurant and heard someone call your husband by name as he left, it clicked! How was your dinner?
Hi Jeri May! I wish you had figured out in time to introduce yourself! I don't remember seeing anyone staring, so no worries! We actually went out to Tamale King but it was closed, so we headed to Granite Shoals. Had the inlaws with us. Food was good, but I had my heart set on the queso and cheese enchiladas from Tamale King!
If you live out that way, please share all your restaurant referrals. We have about four places we frequent when at the lake house, so always looking for some new ones to try!
LOL...You are one brave woman! I would have been screaming my head off. Who knew the big bad wolf, ahem, FOX was real afterall! :)
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